Real leadership growth does not feel like a highlight reel.
It feels like resistance. Fog. The quiet “What am I doing” in your chest while the calendar keeps moving.
High-achievers are trained to power through. Ship the deck. Hit the number. Move on.
Useful most days. Limiting the days that are asking you to grow.
Let it be hard for a minute. Not forever. A minute.
That minute is where your deepest wisdom shows up.
The myth that keeps you stuck
Growth is not a straight line. It is not all clarity and breakthroughs. If you expect ease, you will label tension as failure and sprint past the lesson. The result is familiar. More force. More fixes. No change.
What “hard for a minute” looks like
You notice strain, and you do not immediately optimize it away.
You pause. You look it in the eye. You decide with more truth on the table.
Try this cadence.
Name it.
Say what is actually hard. Use plain words.
“I am resisting this decision.”
“I do not know how to do this without disappointing someone.”
“I am afraid to pick a lane.”
Ground it.
Two slow breaths. Feet on the floor. Feel your seat.
You are getting your nervous system back online so your brain can lead.
Choose one next step.
Not five. One.
“Call the customer and reset expectations.”
“Cut the scope and keep the promise.”
“Tell the team what is changing and why.”
Four patterns I see in operators
If any of these sound familiar, you are in good company.
Urgency theater.
Busyness as proof of value. The pace covers the fear of choosing.
Competence addiction.
You only do what you can ace. Growth asks for beginner energy. You will not look polished while you build the next version.
Clean story bias.
You want the tidy narrative before you act. Transformation is messy by design. Act, learn, adjust.
Optimizing away emotion.
You treat feeling as noise. It is data. Sort it and keep moving.
Why the pause pays off
When you let it be hard for a minute, three things happen.
- Clarity increases.
You name the real problem. You stop wrestling shadows. - Trust rises.
People can feel when you are honest about the cost. They follow a leader who tells the truth and still chooses. - Execution improves.
Cleaner decisions. Fewer walk-backs. Faster recovery when you are wrong.
Micro practices for the week
These are simple. They travel well into boardrooms and standups.
The 60-second reset.
Before a high-stakes conversation, ask yourself:
What is hard here? What matters most. What am I willing to choose?
Answer in one line each.
The two-question check.
When you feel foggy, ask:
What would future me thank me for today?
What am I protecting that no longer needs protection?
The decision box.
Write two columns: Non-negotiables and Flex.
If everything is in non-negotiables, you are not deciding. You are defending.
The honest opener.
Start the meeting with one sentence that proves you are seeing reality.
We are tired and still responsible for this deliverable.”
Then state the aim. Then move.
What to tell your team
Growth is not clean. We will feel it. We will not dramatize it.
We will name it, ground it, and choose our next step.
That is how we build a company that gets better under pressure.
Let it be hard for a minute. Then lead.
If you want help applying this inside your leadership team, book a consultation, and we will build the practices and cadences that fit your context.